FirstBondage.com – free bondage sex galleries

1. Introduction
2. The Roles & Definitions
3. Basic Psychology of Bondage
4. Types of Bondage Bottoms
5. Matchmaking
6. Figuring Out Your Bottom
7. Play Suggestions

7 – Play Suggestions
Once you’ve got your partner figured out, how do you cater to their needs? Experienced players know the brain is the greatest sex organ of all and if a bottom’s head is in the right place, their body will follow. Bondage can go a long ways towards creating the right kind of headspace. It can be symbolic (a collar around the neck) or very real (total immobilization). It can create strong visuals for the bottom either literally or in their mind’s eye. It’s a powerful tool and you should know how to make the most of it given the person(s) you’re playing with.

Experienced players can usually draw from their past experience, but a novice cannot. They haven’t tried most things and may not even know many of the possibilities. So what to do as top? If you’re a bottom and like surprises, you may want to skip this section. If you’re a top and looking for ideas, here are some things to explore either verbally beforehand, or to actually try during a scene with each of the types defined earlier:

Submissive Slave - Remember bondage is usually secondary to this bottom but symbolic bondage can be very welcome. For example, you might try locking a Read the rest of this entry »

1. Introduction
2. The Roles & Definitions
3. Basic Psychology of Bondage
4. Types of Bondage Bottoms
5. Matchmaking
6. Figuring Out Your Bottom
7. Play Suggestions

6- Figuring Out Your Bottom
So let’s say you’ve just met a prospective bottom online or in a bar. Can you figure out which type they are? It might seem obvious to some, but in my experience a lot of players seem to gloss right over many important clues (or they’re horny enough not to care). Without even asking any questions, you can often spot a couple of the types:

1. Does the bottom seem to be mostly interested in you more than the specific play? Did he (or she) address you formally (i.e. as “Sir”)? If their world seems to revolve around you, they’re likely a Submissive Slave.
2. Does this person seem to have any obvious fetish with specific things? Did you meet him or her on Rubber Night at the bar? Do they keep mentioning a particular kind of gear or fetish? If so, they’re likely a Gear Fetishist and you’d best have what they want or keep moving.
3. Does he or she seem to like things on the intense side? Do they ride a fast motorcycle, go sky diving or otherwise live on the edge? If so, you may have an Intensity Freak on your hands.

If none of the above are obvious (and even if they are), you should start asking some easy-to-answer questions: Read the rest of this entry »

1. Introduction
2. The Roles & Definitions
3. Basic Psychology of Bondage
4. Types of Bondage Bottoms
5. Matchmaking
6. Figuring Out Your Bottom
7. Play Suggestions

5 – Matchmaking
So how do you know if someone is compatible with your interests? Many tops have a fair amount of flexibility but it only goes so far. If a top meets a Gear Fetishist and doesn’t have the sort of gear they’re into, things are not likely to turn out well no matter how hard the top tries. Likewise, some tops may not be willing or sufficiently experienced to inflict the kind of pain an Endorphin Pig craves. Compatibility is clearly important.

Too often, bottoms select a top based mainly on trust, appearances and personality with little regard for exactly what the top’s into. For the Submissive Slave, that’s probably OK. For some of the other types, however, it may result in both being disappointed. Matchmaking is obviously important in finding compatible play partners yet it’s amazing how casually it’s often done. You can trust your instincts for some things but that’s only half the battle in finding a bondage partner.
Read the rest of this entry »

1. Introduction
2. The Roles & Definitions
3. Basic Psychology of Bondage
4. Types of Bondage Bottoms
5. Matchmaking
6. Figuring Out Your Bottom
7. Play Suggestions

4 – Types of Bondage Bottoms
If people are into bondage for different reasons, what are they? Why does a particular bottom want to get tied up? It’s a very fundamental and important question but one that’s rarely asked and often difficult for the bottom to answer. I’ve indirectly asked the question of nearly every bottom I’ve played with over the years. Most of the answers point towards a half dozen specific desires or kinds of players. I’ve put my own labels on each of these “types” as follows:

Submissive Slave - This person is mainly interested in submitting to the top. The act of submission is their main turn-on and the top is their main focus. They enjoy being “used” for someone else’s pleasure (although most also expect to also receive pleasure themselves). Read the rest of this entry »

1. Introduction
2. The Roles & Definitions
3. Basic Psychology of Bondage
4. Types of Bondage Bottoms
5. Matchmaking
6. Figuring Out Your Bottom
7. Play Suggestions

3 – Basic Psychology of Bondage
You could probably write a book on why people are into bondage but I just want to touch on a few of the highlights. If you look up “bondage” in the dictionary, you might find definitions like “slavery” or “servitude” and indeed that’s what the word means to some people. To others, it means simply being restrained in some way. I like to think of it as “giving up some amount of control”.
So why are people drawn to bondage? Some might oversimplify and suggest those into bondage want to submit and give up control. For many, however, bondage is just a bridge to take them someplace else they want to go. It might be an occasional dash of spice in an otherwise vanilla sex life or a person’s erotic world might revolve around it. In general, bondage is liberating in some way. It allows things to happen that couldn’t otherwise happen. It’s best viewed as a tool used to enhance sexual or other forms of pleasure. There are many subtle flavors.
Copyright ©1997 Michael Nelson.

1. Introduction
2. The Roles & Definitions
3. Basic Psychology of Bondage
4. Types of Bondage Bottoms
5. Matchmaking
6. Figuring Out Your Bottom
7. Play Suggestions

2 – The Roles & Definitions
In the fetish world, people often use different words to describe the same thing. Just to be clear, here are some of my definitions as they’re used here:

• Bondage – The act of physically or psychologically restraining one or more people
• Players – Those engaging in bondage
• Scene – A specific play session (but many comments apply to an ongoing relationship or lifestyle as well)
• Top – The one doing the restraining (Master, Mistress, Daddy, Domina/nt, etc.)
• Bottom - The one being restrained (submissive, slave, boy, etc.)
• Consensual – Everyone involved in the scene consents to what’s happening and derives pleasure from it

Read the rest of this entry »

1. Introduction
2. The Roles & Definitions
3. Basic Psychology of Bondage
4. Types of Bondage Bottoms
5. Matchmaking
6. Figuring Out Your Bottom
7. Play Suggestions

1 – Introduction

• Why do people want to be tied up?
• How do their preferences for bondage differ?
• How do you recognize and accommodate their needs?
• Why do bondage scenes sometimes “go wrong” and not work out?
• How do you match up bondage partners?

These are some of the questions answered in this article. There are many resources with advice on basic bondage techniques, safety, knots, etc. There are also some good books devoting a few pages to the psychology of the scene. I haven’t seen much practical information, however, that acknowledges the many different kinds of bondage players, how to recognize them and how to best meet their unique needs. While common sense and communication may work with experienced players, what about when one or more are new to the scene? What questions should be asked? In my experience, there are several different “types” of players. The very best scenes happen when everyone involved is well matched or at least understand each other’s needs.

Copyright ©1997 Michael Nelson.